The End of His Week

Today (it is now after midnight, so not exactly today) marks the first anniversary of my little boy's death. The day we last held him in our arms. The day we had too return him the nurse. Never to see him in our waking, earthly life.

I wish I held him longer. I suppose, however, no time would have been long enough.

I have spent the last 9 days recalling what we had done 1 year prior. It hardly seems possible that this much time could have already passed. His birthday was incredibly hard. It did not turn out the way I had hoped. Nate's schedule does not allow for us do much of anything on weekdays and weekends are spent doing things that are more pragmatic. I wrote a couple of things that just felt to personal to post.

My arms still wish for him, my hear aches to see him. I have a lifetime more of years to get through before I can.